Our Telltale reporter asks some tough questions in an interview with Kristy Leissle, Laser Fleet Captain.

TT: So, you are new to the WYC?

KL: Yes, very new. I just joined this year.

TT: What’s your favorite thing about the club so far?

KL: Josh Rusk. He’s a dreamboat.

TT: He certainly is. So, what was your experience with boats before you became Laser Fleet Captain?

KL: Um, not a whole lot. Mostly I’ve worked on arks. Not too much fiberglass on an ark, they’re a more traditional boat. It’s been fun to learn about fiber-glassing and de-lamination and stuff from Goran after working with all the slats of wood and pairs of animals.

TT: How do you see your role, as Captain of the Laser Fleet?

KL: Well, the way it was explained to me when I turned up at my first work party, the Laser Fleet Captain is responsible for defense of the WAC and surrounding waterways in the event that Kirkland attacks. I guess they’re likely to at any time.

TT: How did you feel about taking on that kind of role? Do you have any military command training?

KL: No, I don’t, but I pay very close attention to important battle scenes in epic adventure films, like LOTR and Narnia. I feel up to the responsibility.

TT: But there weren’t any boat battles in any of those films.

KL: That’s true. But I can still make good use of the war cries and inspirational speeches.

TT: Speaking of inspiration, did you think that it would be particularly motivational to name the entire Laser Fleet after famous ships that sank?

KL: Yes, I do. I think it’s great for novice confidence building. It’s all about managing expectations, you see. Just think if you were a novice learning how to sail a laser. They’re a tricky boat to sail, they have a tendency to capsize. They’re already a scary contraption to be in, especially if you’re not used to boats. So say you’re sailing the Laser named Vasa. The original Vasa was commissioned by the King of Sweden to be the flagship of his fleet. A tremendous amount of money and energy went into building it, and it was intended to be the finest warship of its time. On the Vasa’s maiden voyage in 1628, it sailed less than one nautical mile before a small gust of wind blew it over and it sank into the sea. Everyone on board had to swim for their lives. Now, if you’re a novice and you go out in a boat called the Vasa, and you sail it around, and you make it back alive without sinking the boat to the bottom of Union Bay – think of the confidence it would build! You’re not going to care if you rescue the life preserver on the first try or not. You’ll be totally stoked! ‘The King of Sweden couldn’t do it, but I did!’ That’s what you’d be thinking. You’d be bragging to all your friends, counting the minutes till your next lesson. So it’s all about where you set the bar, especially in Laser sailing.

TT: Um, right… OK, next question. What is your vision for the future of the Laser Fleet?

KL: Well, we’ve got 11 boats sailable right now, and I’d like to see every single laser in the fleet  - that’ll be 17 in all, after I make the newest purchase on Thursday – sail-able before I retire. I’d also like to find the bastards who stole Blondie and dunk their heads in a toilet. That’s my vision.

TT: One final question. Are you dating the double-handed Fleet

Captain, Kevin Hawkinson?

KL: Not to my knowledge, although the tabloids seem to think so. (Sighs.) Look, being a Fleet Captain… it’s like, you belong to the public, you know? Your private life is no longer your own. People staring at you on campus… the paparazzi hiding in the sail locker… it’s a lot, sometimes. Kevin and I are both still trying to get used to it. But we accept that this sort of fame is just a part of the job. And it’s a job we’re willing to do, for the good of the Club.

TT: Well, that’s damn decent of you. And that about wraps things up. Thanks for your time!

KL: Pleasure. I look forward to seeing you on the water.

A word with a captain:

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